Thursday, 16 April 2009

Don't InshaAllah Me !!!

Assalam



‘InshaAllah’ is a very common word among Muslims. It means ‘If God Wills’.
‘InshaAllah I shall come tomorrow’ means ‘if God wills I shall come tomorrow’.

So, I see no harm in being such an ardent ‘InshaAllah’ (and ‘Alhamdulillah’) user… Im very particular bout the people around me using ‘inshaAllah’. The moment someone says something bout the future widout saying inshaAllah or the Urdu version ‘Allah ne chaha to’, or even ‘Aage Allah ki marzi’…. I scream into the ears of the people that ‘InshaAllah bolo…… aise nai bolte’ (say inshaAllah…… shudn speak this way)
My mummy had once read out a kissa to me where Huzur S.A.W hadn mentioned ‘inshaAllha’ and Allah hadn liked it. That day onwards I’ve been takin care to say inshaAllah for even the tiniest of things bout the future.
Well…. So much for this part.
Now coming to the part where people don’t like hearing ‘inshaAllah’. I know there are many around me. But, I didn’t know that there are so so so many in the WORLD.. :o :o
A very common example is of how wen I say inshaAllah people take it to mean a ‘NO’.

Friend: “Almas, next Sunday you shud visit my place”
Me : “InshaAllah, I will”
Friend: “No, you just have to come”
Me : “Haaaa, inshaAllah, I will definitely come”
Friend: “Nai, no InshaAllah here…. You HAVE to be there”

:o :o :o :o
Wat dyu mean by no inshaAllah here?????
All i told was, ‘if God Wills, i’ll come’.....
I didn’t say, ‘ I wont come’ .. or even ‘if God Wills, I wont come’

Matlab.. wat u want me to say is,
“Whether God wills or not… I will come”

:D :D :D :D :D

Now tell me dear… is this possible????

Maybe u feel so…. Whatevs… I don’t….!!!!!!!!!!!!!

All I can infer is dat for u

INSHAALLAH= NO

In that case, I shud only assume that u have no ‘feeling’ for this word… and for you it means a ‘no’ coz’ dats wat YOU use it to mean…. YOU say it widout ur heart into it.. and so, YOU feel that others too are saying it for the heck of it!!!

Well…… that’s for u to correct.. not me… wen I say ‘inshaAllah’, I mean just dat, ‘inshaAllah’!



There’s a family living across the street… and they want me to stay in their house and not in the hostel… I know it wud be grtt in many ways..so I told them, “InshaAllah, I will”
As expected…. They didn’t take it to be a ‘yes’ (which it wasn’t)
They didn’t take it to be a ‘probably’ (which it was… coz I don know wat God wils)
They took it for a ‘no’
They insisted on my saying ‘I will’ widout the ‘inshaAllah’, which I didn’t… and they concuded that ‘I didn’t like the idea of stayin wid dem’ and so I told ‘just an inshaAllah’ and not a stronger version, ‘I WILL’

Ab whatever…

And just to make it clear, both this family and the friend I mentioned above are Muslims… non-Muslims tend to accept ‘inshaAllah’ better :D :D

I have, very recently, read a blogpost by a sister where she says that she doesn’t like it wen ppl reply with an ‘inshaAllah it wil get better’ when she has ACTUALLY DESCRIBED her problem to them in detail…. Well, alrite.. she maybe angry at someone or something while she wrote that post… or whatev…maybe she really dsnt like it dat way… we cudve just blamed it on ‘individuality’ and moved on…. But, wats distressing is that every commentator has only chimed in a ‘yes yes me too’!!! oh! So you ALL hate such ‘fake’ answers??? Don’t you??? Alrite… then you go to your blog and take pics of a blue maxi dress, a blue floral printed headscarf, blue stilettos, a silver watch with a blue dial, huge silver danglers with blue beads, a flower vase with RED roses to complement the rest of the things and a skinnnnnnnyyyy white girl wearing a similar dress (not the same) widout hijab as a source of inspiration prolly!! (where neither You look lke the gal in the pic, nor the reader.. forget bout me… I ain’t even White.. I’m very very Brown)
And to this wonderful piece of creativity, you get comments like
“Awwwwwwwwwwwwww sister…. I luv the blue hijab”
“Awwwwwwwwwwwwww sister…. You really know how to match accessories”
“Awwwwwwwwwwwwww sister … I luv ur selections”
“Awwwwwwwwwwwwww sister … I luv ur blog”
“Awwwwwwwwwwwwww sister … it’s beautiful”
“Awwwwwwwwwwwwww sister .... the way the numbers are written on the blue dial of the silver watch is gggggggrrrrrrrrrrrttttttttttttttttt”

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And surely you gals don’t find these comments ‘fake’? Do you?
And even if you get the very same replies from the very same people in your next post where everything is ‘pink’ and then the next post where everything is ‘golden’ and then the next post where everthing is ‘green’…. You still wudn find it fake? Wud u?
It’s only wen some1 says ‘inshaAllah twill b ok” to ur problems dat u find it ‘fake’.



Yes, wen ppl are upset they luk for SOLID answers….dats y the blogger prolly wrote that post… but after u come out of the angry phase, shudn u cool ur head off??? and since this blogger seems to be angry at things, shudn u try to make her ‘understand’ better than just ‘yes yesing her anger’.. and all this in the name of being ‘HONEST’…. And ya “ATTITUDE”
Whatevs….
Bout all such gals, I wonder y do they even bother explaining their problems IN DETAIL to ppl who they think are fake???? Or is it their criterion for distinguishing the fake from the genuine????? Like, ‘the next time I have a BIG problem, im gonna ask EVERYONE, and whoever gives me an ANSWER will be the genuine one in my life…’
For one, if You knew the ANSWER urself you wudn be asking and complaining to others, and IF you urself don’t have an answer to ur problem, how can u expect others to have???? ???
Someone had been talking of ‘ATTITUDE’
Uffff Khuda Paak!
at least the person has replied wid an ‘inshaAllah’…
hasn’t “WHATEVER-ed” you!!!

Then there are ppl who don’t want to be told ‘God doesn’t place a burden upon a soul that he cant bear’ [a part of the 286 Aayat of Surah Al-Baqara---- one of my most favourite Aayaat.. kind of keeps me going!], I personally know a gal who doesn’t like to hear “don’t worry! U will get all the rewards u deserve.. if not in this world, YOU WILL DEFINITELY GET IT IN THE NEXT WORLD”………… now, isn’t that a CORE Islamic belief?????? COOOOOOORRRRRRRRREEE????
Isn’t Qur’an Paak the biggest comfort ???
So, if I try to comfort u saying sumthin of the Word .. u brush me off as being ‘fake’???????
The poet Iqbal has told in “Shikwa” (The Complaint) ‘Allah, why is it dat Muslims will hav to wait for the next world to get their rewards whereas Others are happy in this world’… this is a complaint which, like the poet, we can only say to God….not to ppl… to ppl, the next world shud be an answer.

U say u r not a good little Muslimah….. well, no one is perfect…. But then, we shudn be proud of not being a gud little Muslimah!!!! Unless ofcourse u r thinking of apostasy!
I sin a lot…. I find myself deleting songs from my cel… uploading agan… dleting agn.. uploadin agn…. I find myself waking up late for fajr, more often than not…. Recently someone got my ‘kundli’ read from an astrologer (natal chart)… BIG SIN… almost throwin me out of the fold of Islam… I find myself bitching bout others ( and yes, wen u all get down together and say how ‘she’ bitches bout others and how u JUUUUSSTTTTT don’t like it.. you ARE BITCHING!)..i find myself doin so many things… but ts not sumthin I or anyone shud be proud of! Striving to be better as a person with each day is wat makes a Muslimah .
Shudn I keep trying???
Well… whatevs…

I’d also read another post by another sister who’s a revert (I don remember which blog though!!! Am not a regular reader of that blog.. sort of stumbled upon it somewhere..newaz) and had told how she finds it ‘plastic’ wen she and many Muslimah reverts say ‘inshaAllah, MashaAllah!’ just for the heck of it…she told that we (as in we all) shud try to feel the words and not just mouth it widout meaning!
So true
This reminds of a very close friend who never says MashaAllah (she says inshaAllah though)… NEVER… and no! im not assuming.. I KNOW! So, I go with this gal to her homw for Eid…. And even at her home she doesn say ‘MashaAllah’ fr anything, even on the day of Eid, she dsnt say ‘MashaAllah’ for anything.. until..
Until we all go visit an aunty of hers..
Now this aunty’s family is kind of Islamic… I mean more Islmaic than we normally find in our place.. they don’t have T.V, don’t listen to music, the guys keep the beard of the prpoper length, they have suuuuuchhh a lot of Islamic literature [all in Malayalam :(], they are verrrrrryyyyyyy helpful people, the uncle takes down notes of all Islmaic things [ya, just the way we’d take down notes from the Textbuk of Surgery, use highlighters, make flowcharts… he does that for Learning Islam… ] and ya. He has the ‘sijdah’ mark in his forehead [I luv ppl wid that mark :) ]….{and well.. they are all educated ppl, the uncle retired at a high post (govt. of kerala), have 4 children- engineers and a doc, aren’t rich.. but have enuf by the grace of God!---- am mentioning this coz’ somehow the ‘assumers’ wud assume every Islamic Muslim to be a set-back to the Indian standards… adding on to the illiterate lot!}
So, the moment she steps into that house…. She goes ‘MashaAllah’ this ‘MashaAllah’ that…..
‘we had given our suit piece for stitching’
“MashaAllah”
‘we got it back’
“MahaAllah”
‘it fits well’
“MashaAllah”
‘it luks nice alle?’
“MashaAllah”
And the MashaAllah-ing ended the moment we were out of their door…
In spite of being an avid believer of “Alhamdulillah alaa kolli haal”…… THAT is wat I wud call ‘plastic’…
Newaz..
InshaAllah.. ppl will stop finding ‘inshaAllah’ fake!!! and InshaAllah ppl who do fake it wud stop the act…
Hmmmmm
Allah Hafiz



22 comments:

Asha said...

InsyaAllah I will comment on this when I get back...

LOL..

●๋•guℓѕнαn●๋•™ said...

Assallam Aapi...

well i too read the first post on teh other blog u mentioned...and found it a bit disturbing...i am too a frequent (ya har bar :P) user f inshallah....and i love it....

ppl used to smile when i used to say hopefully before i started loving islam so much ( i am a born muslim, but sadly was never so much into ma faith)....but now when for the same thing i say inshaallah..they ll either look at me or it ll take good 5 mins for a curve to feature on their face....

there are a few muslims who know me from a long time (before the "change")...to them if i say inshaallah they just widen their eye and repeat it somewhat sarcastically.... INSHAALLAH they ll understand the essence and power of it...:D :D

Tere are a few good non-muslim who ask the meaning of teh word and then smile..genuinely and at times repeat the word after me :) :) sweet ..

and for some reason i have a strong belief that to whatever i say inshaallah...God make it happen...no matter how impossible it may seem before...this ACTUALLY happened a lot of time...isn that great :D:D

so inshaallah i wont leave my "inshaallah" and inshaallah god ll be always like this...EVER MERCIFUL :) :) :)

xoxo, nadia said...

I am guilty of what u blogged about ):

When people say InshaAllah...when I want a solid yes, I always feel a little disappointed. I know I shouldn't but I do...

It's true. Only if Allah wills it, it will happen.

minty said...

salam sis, this is a beautiful post.. masha'Allah.. very well thought out. i will visit again.. insha'Allah i mean that :D...

queen said...

your post made me smile, because in that way i am a lot like you, i get really worked up if someone in my family just says i will be there next weekend? do you know if you will be alive next weekend? i say please say Inshallah!

I grew up as the only muslim in my class there was about another 3 at any given time during my high school phase. when my white friends use to say things like I'm definitely going to see that etc etc, i always used to add hopefully at the end of the sentence! i eventually got one of my english friends saying it in the end!!
it also bothers me when people see something good or beautiful of a person and don't say Mashaallah, if anyone looks at my kids and says something without adding Mashaallah it bothers me, usually i add it myself at the end or if it is a non muslim i just say it in my head.
people may not like this but in my experience bad things have happended when people have not said Mashallah a few examples....
my kid is eating away (2 year old) feeding herself quite happily....someone exlaims look at her eat ... note no mashallah, my daughter is sick soon afterwards and wont eat that particular food she was eating that day. say mashallah people.

Candice said...

I used to not understand "inchaallah" very well. The first Muslim I spoke to used to say this, and told me it means "God willing". So I was thinking it was a religious form of "hopefully". Which in a way it is, but it just made it seem so uncertain. It's really just an acknowledgement that God can make anything happen that he wants.

JaLpArI said...

@ candice
ya sister.. you can say it's a religious form of hopefully.. though here it's not our hope but God's will that matters...

@ Minty
wassalam sis!!! thanks you so much for visiting.. and i really wish you visit again... your page doesnt load easily!!! or maybe it's coz' of my slooow connection...
tc :)

@ nadia
oh oh!! dont take it that way dear... some mite be sayin it just for saying... but not all of us!!! for e.g. gulshan and me :)

JaLpArI said...

Heeeeeeennnnnnnnnaaaaaaaa
walaykum Assalam my princess..
where r u? how r u? ??????????????
no ata no pata!!!!
Hmmm
Well… wrong adjective used… twas not a bit disturbing but too disturbing, especially if ud read the comments..ud know!!!

and im most glad to hear it that you too say inshaAllah with all the Faith this word suggests! :)

u r very right... i too feel that any 'Islamic' change in ur attitude is sometimes taken better by Non-Muslims than Muslims.. i guess, it only reminds the Muslims that they too need to change.. but changes are dificult.. so they just try to pass it off!!

i have a friend, Amuda, who has started saying InshaAllah herself :)

and well i believe that by saying inshaAllah we r saying Allah that god we trust in u and we trust in ur will.. and then God brings us no harm...on watever matter weve said inshaAllah happens if it's best for us and dsnt happen if not..
after all, God's Will is the best for us all!!

and yes my gulguli gulshan .. dont ever drop this beautiful habit!!

lots of luv hugs kisses.. to u .. and to chennai :) lolz...
tc...mis u

JaLpArI said...

@ queen
your post made me smile, because in that way i am a lot like you, same pinch for that :) :) :)

well !! u were the only muslim in ur class????? :o :O :o
UK had lots of Muslims i thot!!! :O :O :O
wow!!! i mean... i donno wat else to say!! was it dificult???? i mean.. u know wat i mean!!!

ahhh!! the English friend got a gud habit from u!! nice isn't it?? i just mentioned a friend, amuda, in the comment above.. that she too got the habit from me!! :) :)

and welllll.. the mashaAllah thing!!! ummmm.. i always say Alhamdulillah.... !!! is that ok?? or do we need to say MashaAllah alone???

and yes siter.. you do a very rite thing in teling mashaAllah even if the person doesnt say it!!! a few days bak the very same blogger had writtena post on 'evil eye'...
it's so so true... and no doubt you being a mom are so careful.. i have felt that very strangely, children are affected easily by these evil eyes!!!
"buri nazar waale tera muh kaala"
heard of this??
:)
so, yes inshaAllah we'll all say MashaAllah frm now on!!! :)
in my case, i think Alhamdulillah !! :) :)
tc... :)

Lisa said...

I hate the inshallahs too! Especially when you really intend to get together and then your friend is a no-show. Of course, I've been guilty at times of the same thing. But, it seems that there can be a lot of unnecessary misunderstandings due to the word inshallah! Love you lots!

JaLpArI said...

@Lisa
oh!! you hate inshaAllahs??? well, 3 of us who've written comments here Love inshaAllah!! 2 others havent told if they love it, but havent told that they hate it either!! Asha is yet to write.. :)
so wats with the 'too' dear sis?
in any case sis! shudn be hating it!!! if people take it to mean a 'no', correct THEM rather than making YOURSELF wrong...
coz' inshaAllah HAS to be told..
like sister Queen told... we cant say wat we'd do at the weekend coz we dont even know if we'd be alive...
im sure you too dont!
plz do say inshaAllah, it's a Sunnat! (or maybe farz..not sure bout dat!)
love you too !
:) and ya.. plz do blog soon!
Allah hafiz

JaLpArI said...

EVERYONE

well.. didnt i mention a 'kissa' in this post where Huzur S.A.W forgets to say inshaAllah...
know wat??? that 'kissa' actually is the reason behind the verse 18:23 (Surah Kahf) was revealed!!
:) :) :) :)
Alhamdulillah!!! am so happy!!!!!!
ok so ive written a post in my other blog...
plz do read it.... it tells bout that event and a hadith related to it...
here's the link
http://striving-muslimah.blogspot.com/2009/04/inshaallah-in-quran.htmltc
Allah hafiz

queen said...

Hi Almas i can understand why you would say Alhamdulilah as you are thanking Allah for everything right? i usually say Alhamdulilah when i get home in one piece or when i get something that i have wanted. I usually say Mashallah if i see something pretty, am amazed by someones intelligence, wealth etc!! i do not wish to cast an evil eye you see. yes I have heard of that phrase before. i am aware of the evil eye, but unfortunately it can sometimes occur without the person intending any harm, which is why saying Mashallah is very important, a beautiful flower, abeautiful face a talent everything must be viewed with a mashallah! yes about my school days i am gonna write a post on that soon so please do read it when i do! take care!

xoxo, nadia said...

Sometimes, I say InshaAllah when I actually mean NO.

I dont want to hurt the persons feelings.

Yikes, I am bad.

Asha said...

Salaam Almas!

I wrote a long reply yesterday but somehow my internet explorer decided to die on me yesterday before I could click "Publish"..!

Haha anyway, there is nothing wrong in saying InsyaAllah. First of all, you are supposed to say it when you are unsure if you can perform something for someone but you will do if Allah wills it.

However, if you have already decided in your heart that you are not going to perform it and yet you still say insyaAllah, to me that is just using Allah's name in vain. I consider that as lying and to cover up, you pepper your sentences with InsyaAllah so as to please the person. Just my opinion though :)

But I am not saying you shouldn't say insyaAllah at all! Say it if you really have the intention to do it for the person IF Allah wills it.

I read somewhere that if you use the 7 kalimahs (like Alhamdulillah, InsyaAllah, Astargfirullah etc..), you will be rewarded in the Hereafter (I can't remember what it is).. So yes, use it often because of the benefit you will get! :)

kashif said...

The phrase "inshaAllah" has been misused by many Muslims where they use this phrase when they don't intend to do something. And instead of taking the blame they transfer the responsibility to Allah.

So, that's why to lot of people, this phrase has become a polite way of saying "no." Therefore, people insist that "no Inshallah, you have to..."

:-)

mashaAllah.

JaLpArI said...

@ queen
ya...but, well.. it means 'Praise be to Allah' and it includes all things gud and bad... though we ususally say it for gud things....

and ya i know evil eye can be even wen the person didnt mean any harm :(
.............

:) :) :)
oh ya.. plz do write bout it...
:) :)
u tc too..

JaLpArI said...

@ nadia
well dear.. dats wrong i think.. its kind of abusing the word....
well me thinks so!!!

JaLpArI said...

Wassalam Asha
well/// i too have read that we r rewarded if do zikr of those kalimahs often....

and well regarding 'inshaAllah'... well, i dont think it's wen u r uncertain or certain bout sumthing.. i have always believed that we have to say it for anything of the future coz we dont know wat the future holds...

like wat i told in a previous comment, Huzur S.A.W hadn said 'inshaAllah' and Allah hadn liked it! and the message was sent thru Jibraeel A.S that twas coz of not saying 'inshaAllah'. wat i dint know was that it is at this time that a verse was revealed.. now, the thing that i infer is.. whether or not others use it mean a 'no' or 'uncertainty', we shud follow the Qur'an and do wat it says....
if Allah Himself says to say inshaAllah, how can it go vain? esp wen we dont even know if we wud take the next breath. i mean how can we be sure of doing anything?

but, i do agree that this word has been misused enuf to have brought this bad image to itself.. and that is why it's always taken to mean 'no'

like u told, i also feel that a person shudn use it to pepper up his sentences or to please PEOPLE,... it shud be said from the heart.. and definitely not with an ill-feeling in ur heart.
that wud be wrong... coz' another Verse(don remember wich 1)speaks of Intentions...
so, i totaly agree dat if its said with a wrong intention, it goes in vain....

JaLpArI said...

Brother Kashif

ya... thats true..
many, as i have come to know :) say inshaAllah purposely, though they mean "No"... i think it falls under one of the various misuses of the Qur'an...
like the husband beating the wife mercilessly, wen wat the Qur'an says is so different!!!

●๋•guℓѕнαn●๋•™ said...

Assallam Aapi...

sorry to reply here...ds has nothing to do wid ur post :P

just wanted to tell u ..that i am doing f9..less on orkut ..so cudn drop any scrap or msg....i am hell busy...(ok a lil on phone 2 :D )

inshallah ..i ll get back 2 ma original form once ds stupid exam monster leaves my innocent life ;)..

hope u r doing good 2...ll love to hear 4m u :)

Allah hafiz

Nushrat said...

Assalamu alaikum sis
I wanted to know what reply should be given to a person who says incha Allah

For example if someone tells me : "incha Allah , this will happen"

Do I reply with "Ameen"?

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