Saturday, 30 May 2009

Love You Too Aapa :)

Aapa….
Love You Too… :) :) :)

Thank you so much for sayin ‘Luv U’….. it’s very rare from your mouth. Nai?
:D :D :D :D :D :D
You have no idea how good I am feeling…
Not that I doubt ur love for me, but, fir bhi, you know, love shud be expressed…. :D :D :D
I love you too….
We are a veryyy small family…. Tiny…
There’s a God above all….. and then there’s us….
And know wat ? it’s good this way…
Though I must say, sometimes it really hurts…. Like before Fiza Faris turned one… I had gone to a toy shop here with Anisa to buy things for them…. Tab Ani told ki,
“Ya Almas, you will have to give them good things…. You are the only one to give from their mummy’s side na!”

It felt bad….
It feels bad that I am the only one from ur side…Calcutta is far away….
I remain as the only one….
It scares me sometimes….

Wat scares me more is that You wud be the only one for my children, InshaAllah wen they come. Will my children too have a childhood as lonely as mine?
Will they ever be able to give gifts to Fiza Faris? I mean hi-fi types…. I wonder if Don will love my kids… Im so scared bout my future with Don… I don want anything to happen to us aapa-You and Me…..
I love you….
People keep going away from my life… it’s kind of amusing wen seen in retrospect…
I don want my children to be ‘cousin-less’ if u know wat I mean….
Sometimes I think twud hav been better if we were boys..
We wud still be wid abbu-mummy….
They wudn be alone…
And our children wud be together…..
Jaise ki…. Ayaan is their brother…
Faris wud ve been the elder brother to my kids… he wud come back from his classes and play with my children….
But then. I feel.. wats the point?
I too remember playing with Khalid Bhaiya….
Nothing remains…………..

…. Wen I think of the people here, I mean at home, it hurts coz they are broken relations…....

I also remember playing with Gem bhaiya, Manik bhaiya….. while I know that was for a very brief time, I don’t have anything sad haunting me
Wen I think of Calcutta, I don’t feel any love… NIL…. But in the least… i know its coz of the distance.. the relations aren’t broken…..

In that way im glad we r sisters…. U hav gone away.. and I wud inshaAllah go away ….
There wudn be any ‘living together mess’….

Fir bhi………..sometimes I wish I had a huuuuuuuuuuugggggggggggeeeeeeee family…. With cousin brothers and sisters, uncles and aunties…..

Newaz….
Good that we r alone……… save a lot of tears… :D
And ya…. Love you too…..
Love you sooooooooooooooo much.


And hey.. sorry cudn do it earlier….
Here’s the CONGRATS…..
:D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D




So, wen do I et a treat????????





Tc aapa………..
Lots of kisses (advanced kisses---- can tear all the shields.. ;D)





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